~*♥*~Pebbles~*♥*~ (lost_n_unfound) wrote in syllogists_r_us,
~*♥*~Pebbles~*♥*~
lost_n_unfound
syllogists_r_us

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Urg...

Been doing some thinking… about people… Boys and girls and people. Jealousy. Truth. Deceit. Everything…
Girls are jealous. For instance, a bisexual girl can have both a boyfriends and a girlfriend. If either look at another chick, they’re jealous. Girls are rarely ever jealous of guys. Always just themselves. They’re their own competition. One girl compared to another…
Girls seem to be made to be judged. Think about it. Males still have a dominant rule. Love is just a fixation of one’s imagination… We are judged for being ugly or fat or slutty or prude. Nothing’s ever good enough and everything’s always wrong… Always… We can be innocent and perfect, but then one will think “Oh, she won’t put out” and if they do put out “Oh, she’s a whore and easy.” Who are we supposed to be?
(I think that’s why so many chicks nowadays are turning bisexual or lesbian. The constant standards we have to live by and with another girl, she can sympathize and she knows the utter shit of it all… Always being watched and judged and thought of as just a walking sex machine-no feelings… But girls can be so much deeper than that if they haven’t already accepted their undefined yet laid out sex path ahead… Hell, I know that’s some of what hooked me…)
But then there’s guys. And there’s that illusion we’ve all created in our minds of “the perfect man.” Only, there’s no such thing as a man, nonetheless a perfect one. They all end up being assholes. All of them. None of them can ever understand the utter complexity of a chick’s brain and her emotions. They’re all just walking boners. I loathe them all. Such enmity and animosity built up for the lot of the, it’s crazy… Ass wipes…
All they can ever seem to think about anymore is sex and it’s not even sentimental or special and loving… It’s dirty… Disgusting. Girls are now just a pawn in a never-ending game of lust. We’re all like some fine article of clothing: some cheap, some fancy, some used, some beautiful, some thrifty, some second-hand, some shining, some dull, some dark, some light… And we’re bought with just three simple words and sometimes not even that and we get used and “worn” over and over again, so much so that finally we’re “too” worn for the consumers’ taste and they move on to the next article… The next item… The next victim…
Disgusting… Pigs…
And they’re always insisting that they’re different. Not like the rest of them… Hey, buddy: you got a penis, you’re just like the rest of them, I say. Fuck so-called differences. The world’s a game with pawns and players and the basic rules will never change… Never…
All lies just to stick their cock in something wet. Well, I’m sick of it. Even thirteen year old boys now play that damned “I-love-you” card and the sad part is: we still all fall for it… Maybe not every single one of us, but there’s hardly a case deriving from the “norm” of hopeless damsels.
Sadly, love is no longer wonderful or brilliant. It’s a word tossed around by anyone that can pronounce it… Love isn’t beautiful, like it should be… Love is… lust… And personally, I am not one to live by lust.
But, are there really some out there capable of the true meaning behind the indefinable word? is it just that-a word? Some hopeless concoction of continents and vowels created to give us all some false optimism to live and go about by?
Who out there believes in love and has faith in its true existence? …I don’t… Not anymore… (I have someone I’d risk anything for… Who I feel for beyond my wildest dreams and who can craze my mind with just a glance… but it hurts, too… I love her so much… and I don’t know if I’m so obsessed with my love for her that I’ve become so utterly consumed in it that I can no longer feel anything back… Can it be? Is it love? It’s not so much lust as I just enjoy holding her… Just touching her… Not sexually even or anything… just touching… accidentally, even… Love tends to be a bitch when it’s real… But is it???)
And people are all the same. Fighting and struggling and killing just to be “the best”… Downing your own brother’s worth just to make it out on top yourself. To have that control… Life’s about control, too… And love, in essence, is control…
Think about it…
And what is truth or honesty? What is that? No one is ever really true to themselves anyway, due to uncontrollable, unavoidable, undeniable, unwanted, yet so real consequences… So everyone lives life by “the standards”. No one ever tells the truth anymore, either. All just bullshit and lies to get their way (though not necessarily what they originally wanted-remember, no one is ever really true to themselves) or to weasel their way out of something they knew was wrong or know is wrong… You just can’t trust anyone anymore… Lying to better your own self image… To gain control over what you never really had control over in the first place…?? Could be…

Nevermind... I don't know what I'm saying...
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